WIN_20160114_23_56_57_ProThis is exciting. No, I mean really exciting. I have tested our trip leader and she is not flappable. You are welcome, trip-mates. I tried. I really, really tried. I, however can be completely counted on for excitement. As if you doubted for one second that it would be boring to travel with me. Bawhahahaha. Oh, no. I sit here typing madly on an adrenaline fueled junkie ride at 11 p.m. the night before I am set to hear the alarm shriek at 4:something AM. Oh yes, I’m up and I am NOT sleepy. I’m on fire, baby.

Today, I had my third migraine in as many days. Let’s be clear that migraine pills make me a bit muddled and migraines tend to make my left eye want to close like a pirate, but it hurts, so it’s not funny like a pirate. And, let me be honest and say that really the problem started months ago and I can’t remember my excuse right now. So, I finally finished packing. I hugged my boys goodbye, one leaves for Colorado for college tomorrow, and crawled into bed. Tired, wired and (damn I wish I could come up with another word that rhymed right here…) semi-satisfied that I can survive for 10 days in the jungle with what’s in my bag. It weighs bang on at 40 pounds (important for the return flight on the hopper) and my carry-on weighs 10. Here’s the cool part. The Deep Eddy Ruby Red Vodka in my pack probably weighs 10 pounds, so when it’s gone, I can hop the hopper. I digress.

The hubs decided that we should check my flights one more time. Okay, Mr. Responsible (who is not going on my girls trip) decided that he would check the flights. I had emailed them into our shared Evernote folder. I’m settling into the sheets and thinking about the hat I forgot to pack when he saunters in the room and announces that “It says here that you fly out on Saturday.” In my head, “oh *&^%T what’s today? When’s Saturday? He said that like Saturday is not tomorrow. Wait, WHAT???” I thought for a second that maybe I was just excited and in a hurry and that Ann is not flying out till Saturday too. I text her. It’s 10 PM. I mean, really, who could possibly be all set and ready and asleep at 10 PM the night before I think we’re supposed to leave? No answer. Adrenaline spikes a bit. Hmmm. I ring her. It took awhile and this sleepy, but I have to admit quite chipper voice says, “Good Morning!” Ummmm… Ann? I’m thinking “this is not your wake up call, but it might wake you up when I say this…” Instead I say, “Uhhh, are you really asleep?” She was. When I ask her what day she’s flying out, I know she thinks I’m joking. Panic is seriously rising at this point. “Ann,” I almost yell, “Do you fly out tomorrow morning?” Rustling. “Uh… yes?” “My itinerary is wrong,” I croak. “It says I don’t leave until Saturday.” She makes me hang on while she gets out of bed (this still amazes me, by the way) to check her itenerary. “Yep. Tomorrow at 7:08.” Oh hell-fire and damnation I think. “I’ve already screwed it up. I’m gonna have to buy a whole ‘nother round of airline tickets. I can’t bail on everyone now,” my hysteria is rising and I can feel myself building up to yell some obscenities because my head doesn’t hurt right at this moment and I’ve been walking around in a mellow, migraine funk all day and it would feel really good to just belt out some… and then I hear her calm voice yammering, speaking about catching up and flying down on a hopper and meeting her at… “Ann, you don’t understand,” I plead. “My bags are packed, they weigh too much on the way down to take the hopper. I CAN’T DITCH THE RUBY RED!” In my head, well, if I don’t take the hiking shoes, and you know, I can rinse out my clothes, oh hell, who needs clothes? “Wait, I say, let me make some calls. I will either make it tomorrow or I won’t. I’ll text you. Go back to sleep.” She laughs, “You expect me to go back to sleep? Not until I know your plan.” Fearless leader. She’s laughing. She’s not mad. Does she realize that I just jolted her out of slumber before a ridiculously early alarm? YOU ARE WELCOME trip-mates. She’s tried. She passed the test. Yes, I did this for you.

Okay, I hang up and call Travelocity. I almost go through the line when the little girl at the other end could barely speak English and she’s reading from a script like a 3rd grader and is obviously listening for key words. In rapid fire, high-pitched Texan I calmly say, “Help! I need your help. I’m flying out tomorrow. Well, I’m supposed to be flying out tomorrow, but my itinerary is wrong! It says I don’t fly until Saturday! Oh my gosh, what do I do? I can’t fly out on Saturday, I’m supposed to already be there!” She says, “I see that you must be worried. I hear that you want to check on your flights for Saturday, is that correct?” Oh. My. GoshGollyJeezeLaweez… I breathe. Okay. Stay calm. Channel the Ann. She took my ridiculously long reservation number. “I see that you’re flying out of San Jose on the 24th” my wheels are spinning… and BOOM like a ton of bricks the fog thins just enough that I can remember back to October when I booked, then changed my flight. I went through the airline directly on my outbound flight so I could match up with Ann. I wanted to go early to help her. I’m such a helper, I muse. The itinerary the hubs was looking at was super old, the first one before I changed my mind AND my flight. “Thank you!” I yell, “That’s exactly what I needed.”

I search my inbox and find my NEW and CORRECT outbound flight information in my spam folder. Right! I call Ann. “We’re good,” I say happily. “So you got them changed?” Uh… well, that’s a looonggg story. I kind of tell her. She laughs, “Hold on, let me tell Mark.” Great. I hear Mark pipe in laughing, “That’s it, Sarah. I want you two to check in every day, now.” Ha ha Mark, this is not that funny. Oh, but it is. He has no idea how good at this excitement stuff I am. My hubs just shakes his head and grins. So glad I could entertain all you people who will be snoring in like five seconds. I try to glare, but think I only pull off a sheepish grin.

So here I sit, while I pray Ann is snoozing. Nothing like a little excitement to start your trip. The Ruby Red is safe in my bag. My blood pressure is slowly returning to normal and there’s no harm, no foul language. Well, maybe a few things slipped out.

Pura Vida friends. This adventure has started. Hold on to your … oh crap, I still have to find my hat!


Trips with Wellness Adventures are now forming for 2017. Tell them you want to go on the trip with Sarah. We’ll have adventures!!

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